Book Bloggin' 23rd September 2013

Finished: The Yellowstone Conundrum by John Randall

Describing the ripping open of the caldera as a being like a hymen splitting on a virgin? Really? You couldn't come up with a better analogy?!! Yep, that's right, the author of this book described the eruption of the Yellowstone supervolcano as a hymen being ripped. I mean, seriously, if you were writing a book, why would that analogy even come into your head? I am dumbfounded. Add to that, the numerous pictures (what are we 5 years old? Does our interest need to be kept by pretty pictures? No! Stop patronising your readers). And don't even get me started on the reduced font sizes for when people are speaking quietly, or the bold italics(or just plain italics) for a flashback, incase we couldn't tell that's what we were reading. Then ofcourse there are the characters whose names randomly change - is it Frohling or Frohming on this page/ in this paragraph? Be surprised!!

It's hard to be positive when there is literally so much wrong with this book. It is actually a miracle that the author managed to keep me interested. But amazingly, the concept of this book is actually pretty solid and apart from the quite frankly shit editing(it's called spell check - try it some time!) and analogies, he has handled it fairly well. This is only the first book of a planned series, so don't expect resolution in this novel. Hopefully the next one comes out sooner then his last few books (there are very sizable gaps in the books he has published - try decades) as I would like to see what happens/how the author handles it sooner rather than later.

In the postscript by the author he mentions that all his books would make great movies - I am sure they would, but to be quite frank the potential is lost as the writing is so shit. Invest in an editor as it will end up being worth the cost! And additionally - stop writing as if you were writing a movie script - it would go a long way to explaining the odd style of writing and also the pictures.. but not far enough.

Oh & where was the conundrum? I would have though there wasn't one.. flee or die.. no real conundrum there..

Started: The Big One by Kevin E. Ready